Tuesday, March 18, 2014

THE JEWISH NEIGHBORHOOD

So, here's the gist of things. I life in a decently large neighborhood. And like, 95% of the people that live here are Jewish. And people always assume I'm Jewish when they see me in the neighborhood, and it can get kind of annoying.

The Jewish people, however, ALL KNOW WHO I AM. I swear to god, they hate me. I walk down the street and wave hello, and they scoff. And do many other things to show how they detest me.

ONE NIGHT HOWEVER. I. WILL. NEVER. FORGET.
On Christmas a few years ago, I was eagerly waiting for Santa. And looking out my window. At around 12-1 in the morning, I see some movement. OHMYGAWDITSSANTA. It wasn't Santa. It was 3 jewish teenagers (like 16 or 17). Being hooligans and dancing around. THEN I FOUND OUT THEIR REAL MISSION.

THEY PEED ON MY LAWN. THESE TEENAGERS PEED ON MY LAWN. WHY?!?!!?

But.... I don't only see ONE SIDE OF THE STORY. I'm sure a lot of the Jewish people don't dislike me. And if they did, they would have the decency not to scoff at me. And its not like all the Jewish were in on the plan to pee on my lawn. I see (or at least try to) both sides of the story.

2 comments:

  1. Some people think I'm jewish sometimes because I have curly hair.

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  2. "And its not like all the Jewish were in on the plan to pee on my lawn" Sure...we TOTALLY weren't all in on that. Just kidding of course. But I do find it hilarious.

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